Silver Sex Wins The Gold

2 minutes

Certain things are generally perceived as improving as we get older. Issues like managing finances and mastering our work, for example. More experience, more skills, more enjoyment. The supposed exception? Our sex lives. In that same way that people in their 30s are seen as ancient when we are little, pop culture practically screams that sex is for the young and the older you get, the less sex you’ll be having. This info is mis-info.

The facts: Older folks are having mature sex, even senior sex, and the majority of men and women over 60 in the US are sexually active, most averaging at least two to three times monthly (more often than many younger adults).

How much, how good?
One reason for the fact gap: quality vs quantity. One large, long-term study conducted over an 18-year period found that younger people were satisfied when they were having a lot of intercourse and other sexual adventures. The same study discovered that, as people get older and acquire more sexual wisdom, they value good sex over a lot of sex. So when asked. “How is your sex life?”, their decline in satisfaction is taken as a decline in frequency of sex in later life.

The study underlines the benefits of maturing, including more knowledge in all areas of life, sexuality included, as older people report understanding their own sexual preferences more, what their partners are (and aren’t) into, and how this spills over into intimacy. Older people in romantic relationships report engaging in sexual exploration and a focus on their partner’s pleasure.

Comfortable in their skin
This sexual wisdom is often paired with another advantage of getting older: not caring so much what others think about us. The erotic freedom that comes with body acceptance and letting go of hang-ups can lead to deeper, more satisfying intercourse and other sexual practices. Which is great news, as sex after age 60, or 70, or beyond, is a great predictor of a longer, healthier life. As well as a more enjoyable one. The clichés should be put out to pasture. Not speaking truthfully about the joys of mature sex does everyone a disservice.